I have a strong tendency towards belligerence-for instance, it’s one reason I basically quit drinking-and I could easily fall into OCS. I had to laugh, because he knows me very well. He did, and he warned me, “Watch out! Don’t start thinking about this, and then start to do it yourself.” I described oppositional conversational style to my husband and asked if he knew what I was talking about. In the second example, the contradictory responses felt like a challenge. This kind of debate did indeed throw up a lot of interesting insights and information.

Perhaps, for him, it’s a tactic to drive the conversation forward and to keep it interesting. In the case of the first example, my interlocutor used OCS in a very warm, engaging way. Is OCS a strategy that particular people use consistently? Or is there something about me, or about that particular conversation, that induced these people to use it?Īlong those lines, is OCS a way to try to assert dominance, by correction? That’s how it feels, and also…ĭo people who use OCS recognize this style of engagement in themselves do they see a pattern in their behavior that’s different from that of most other people?ĭo they have any idea how tiresome it can be? Here are my questions about oppositional conversational style: Since those conversations, I’ve noticed this phenomenon several times. “No, for someone like me, it’s no problem,” she answered. “That must have been really difficult,” I said. I saw this style again, in a chat with friend’s wife who, no matter what casual remark I made, would disagree. And I could tell that if I’d said, “Y is important,” he would’ve argued for X. If I said, “X is important,” he’d say, “No, actually, Y is important.” For two hours. We were talking about social media, and before long, I realized that whatever I’d say, he’d disagree with me. I noticed this for the first time in a conversation with a guy a few months ago.

He or she may do this in a friendly way, or a belligerent way, but this person frames remarks in opposition to whatever you venture. Turns out that many people have noticed it! From both sides of the OCS-dominated conversation.Ī person with oppositional conversational style is a person who, in conversation, disagrees with and corrects whatever you say. Which surprised, me at first, because when I identified OCS, I thought I was the only person who had ever noticed it. Back by popular demand is the assay I wrote about the ' oppositional conversational style.' This post really seems to strike a chord with people.

You're doing it wrong wow